Desperate for change but feeling stuck? The only way out, is in.
This has been a tough blog to write. I've started + stopped writing this too many times to count. I've typed up several drafts, deleted them all and started again. I've sat in three different coffee stores, lounged in my bed sipping tea + finally I'm finishing this at my desk accompanied by an empty Starbucks.
Recently I've been thinking about some pretty big life changes or rather I've finally acknowledged that I've been procrastinating and it's time to make said changes.
Procrastination is a tricky thing.We pretend that it's about not being ready, not having enough time, needing to be responsible, make money or some other really practical sounding excuse.
The truth however is that procrastination is really just cleverly disguised fear. Fear of change. Fear of admitting what we truly want. Fear that change will mean losing everything we have and ultimately fear of who we will become.
Change brings with it so many unknowns and it's easy to get caught up in future tripping as we anticipate all the things that could go wrong. And the more we anticipate all the things that could go wrong, the more paralyzed we feel. We create insurmountable ( but really practical sounding) obstacles that ensure that we both simultaneously hunger for change and yet stay stuck, frustrated + frozen where we are.
We know that we should leave that job or relationship. We know that our addiction is a temporary band aid to a wound that we really need to heal. It's all a bizarre facade to mask the truth that we're scared to live the life we're really meant to live. Because honestly, who are we to have that privilege, that light, that freedom?!
And yet... the scariest question we have to ask ourselves is, "What is the cost not to make the change?" How long can you try to push down the unease, dissatisfaction, discomfort + anxiety? And... hows that working anyways? Ever noticed that if you try to block feelings of discomfort that they come back later but even bigger?
What if the fear, anxiety, discomfort, frustration + dissatisfaction are all messengers sneaking in to let you know that something is out of alignment. What if these feelings are the doorway to the fulfillment, peace + joy that you're truly seeking?
It takes courage to surrender, face these feelings + listen patiently to what they're trying to tell you. When I think about it though, really what is the choice? Numb out, stay paralyzed + live a muted version of your life or face the fear, welcome it in and surrender to the life you're really meant to live? It feels like a no brainer and yet its not an easy no brainer.
I'm diving deep into these feelings, exploring the discomfort and getting to know myself a whole lot better. What do I truly want? What does loss really mean and why the hell do I care what other people think?
I've been meditating a lot, seeking out moments of stillness + taking my spiritual practice to the ever evolving next level. How about you? Does the joy of where you want to be outweigh the "struggle" to get there? If it does then you're ready too. I welcome you to join me on this journey...
3 Simple (but not totally comfortable) steps to move through Procrastination + Feeling Stuck...
Accept where you are. Acceptance is key. Acceptance doesn’t mean you don’t want to change it but accepting where you are has tremendous power. “I’m unhappy. I’m stuck. I don’t like my job" You fill in the descriptor. Don't judge it.
Invite the discomfort in + give it a name. Welcome it like a guest. Know that it is here to tell you something important. This is all about... you guessed it- Surrender. Know that the feelings will not kill you... even though you may think they will. Get really specific + name the type of fear.
Go Inwards then Take Action: Your inner guidance can't be heard in bussy-ness + fear. You need to get really, really still. Meditate, Breathe, go to yoga, get out into nature + spend some time alone. Ask for help + know that the action you need to take will come to you. You may need to reach out for support ... your intuition will tell you. Trust it.
I'm sending you so much light + love. Drop me a note below or straight to my inbox and let me know how its going. I'm rooting for you, the universe is rooting for you and I know your heart is too! I'll see you on the other side.
xo